The results of Aotearoa Online Sex and Dating Survey released today by Project Gender show people over 50 are dating dangerously and loving it.

“How New Zealanders conduct our relationships has changed and it’s clear that technology has a key part to play in this change. 87% of people who sign up to dating apps actively go on dates. 72% of men report they are looking for casual sexual relationships i.e. “no strings attached” or “friends with benefits”, while only 46% of women are looking for the same” says Tania Domett, research director of Project Gender.

To understand the topic better and to help users protect themselves when they are dating online, Project Gender conducted a nationwide survey into people’s online dating habits to which 823 people responded.

“The Aotearoa Online Sex and Dating Survey shows that compared to the under 30s, the over 50s aren't being particularly cautious or reserved online, or when meeting in person”, continues Domett.

23% of straight women 50+ years ‘Rarely’ or 'Never’ tell people where they are going and why, compared to 7% of straight women under 30. Worryingly, they are not keeping on top of their sexual health with 42% (vs. 16% U30) of the over 50s stating they ‘Never’ use protection against STIs.

“However, 50+ years group are less likely to be pressure into doing something sexual they weren’t comfortable with, 80% saying they hadn’t vs. 64% of under 30s.” continues Domett.

The majority of men who use dating apps rate their sexual experiences with people they met on dating apps in the last 12 months as enjoyable - 62% of straight men and 58% of gay and bisexual men said most of the sex they had was enjoyable. This compares to 48% of lesbian and bisexual women and 45% of straight women.

Young people are being responsible with public, digital and STI safety.

49% of under 30 years (all genders and sexualities) “Always” tell someone where they are going and why on a first date, compared to just 26% of 50+ years (37% 30-39 and 31% 40 – 49), and young people are the group least likely to send an intimate photo - under 30s– 35% (vs. 51% of 40 – 49 and 49% 50+).

While the under 30s are more sussed about their public safety, they are engaging in rough/violent sex acts and not always consensually. Under 30s are twice as likely as over 30s to have been choked or suffocated during sex (43% vs. 22%), with around half (53%) “Always” giving consent for this to happen across all age groups.

“These figures show that the sex education messages young people are receiving about public safety, digital safety and STI protection are getting through. Even so, we are seeing high numbers of young heterosexual women experiencing sex acts like choking and suffocating, many of them non-consensually. These results show us that these young women perhaps don’t have the agency over their sexual experiences that us older feminists hoped they would have.” says Domett.

“The results also show older people need to be reminded about STI protection”.